I feel I have failed at something more important than anything else in life, motherhood. I didn't want my kids to have a drunken mother and I was the only one of my four siblings that did not succumb to alcoholism. I know she was only 9 years old when my sister died at age 35 with 3 small children. Sometimes I feel: "My daughter would rather it was me that died as little as she cares for me." When my sister died, I know I had a lot of grief and a lot of fear because the cancer that killed her runs in families and the doctors were treating me like I was a cancer waiting to happen.I wanted them to be proud of me and I was the only one in my biological family to become a college graduate. It was a terrible time filled with fright and grief.And then, as he comes round into consciousness, he turns to the camera: “I hope you realise, Mr Editor, that I’m dying with every minute.”When Ben’s mother Anne first saw some of the footage Ben had made, shortly after his death, she didn’t at first concur with her son’s wishes.“To be honest, I wanted to bury it,” says Anne Rogers, whose husband Mike died of cancer a few months after Ben’s own death, worn out in part by the stress of looking after his son, who had lived with his parents in their house in Alton, Derbyshire during his final 24 months.Online dating (or Internet dating) is a system that enables strangers to find and introduce themselves to new personal connections over the Internet, usually with the goal of developing personal, romantic, or sexual relationships.An online dating service is a company that provides specific mechanisms (generally websites or applications) for online dating through the use of Internet-connected personal computers or mobile devices.
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There’s a telling piece of footage that didn’t make the final cut of Ben: Diary of a Heroin Addict, Sky1’s upcoming documentary about Ben Rogers, who died at the age of 34 last year after a 14-year addiction to heroin.
Ben spent the last two years of his life filming his family and his own drug-taking extensively.
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